yesterday, i found tony squares’s wallet in my girlfriend’s bedroom. it seemed weird at the time to find it there until she explained everything to me (oops, i thought you had to be in school to have homework). anyway, i scanned his license because i thought you guys would be interested. he looks great and [...]

happy 4-20, mother fuckers! my buddy sent this to me because apparently it’s the biggest thing on the internet right now. it even got a two-page write up in “high times” magazine or whatever it’s called. i don’t like the message at the bottom, though. i don’t like things with messages.
there’s a rumor going around [...]

a friend of mine and i saw tony squares getting into his car somewhere around hollywood, so we asked if we could take a picture of him. it cost $14 and the car was too shiny and spotless to photograph well, but you should still be able to see that it is indeed a sporty [...]

when i showed tony squares this comic, he inquired about the color i used to make his hair. after i told him it was gray, he responded, “well, i’ve never heard of it, and kill me if i ever have to see it again.”
was he joking? i have no idea. and even [...]

i found some message board where people are writing facts about tony squares. i don’t remember the address, but this one was my favorite:
“tony squares isn’t afraid of commitment. commitment’s afraid of tony squares.”
submitted by jeffrey woods.

tony squares walks into the booth, and we all attempt to shake his hand. he just bows. me and the rest of the drive time crew think this is a very nice gesture. i quickly do the time, weather, and station i.d. and we move on…
we’re gonna start off with some tough questions, just [...]